she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize