I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Randomize
