I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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