There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
