I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
