Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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