Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
