I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
