Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
