i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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