It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
