Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
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