this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
