he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
