i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I have tasted many bathrooms
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
