Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
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