You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize