; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
