did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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