guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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