Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
