So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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