I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Randomize
