its not stalking. its research.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Randomize