Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
