Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
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