Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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