dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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