YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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