Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
