Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
She announced her abortion via fbk
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Randomize
