drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
