I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
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