I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Randomize
