I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
