Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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