there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Randomize
