Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Randomize
