i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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