he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
