I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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