I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
