ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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