I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
