bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
