Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
I want her autograph on my taint
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Randomize
