physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
third nipple confirmed
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
