Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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