I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
