i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
